Wednesday, October 1, 2014
When Teens Ask For Advice
When your teen asks you for advice, you think you have hit the holy grail of parenting! But the truth often is that they need you to say the wrong thing, (from their point of view)so they can disagree with you. The disagreeing is the teenage brain's way of saying, I can do it, I can stand on my own two feet.
How frustrating!! Of course you know you are right! How could you not be with so many years of life experience behind you, and an intimate understanding of this young person standing in front of you. And it feels hurtful to be discounted and ignored. But try not to take it personally. The advice you have given may in fact have parked itself away in your teen's brain and been spouted off to a friend sounding like it was his/her idea all along. Unfortunately you may not have had a ticket to the performance, limited seating only, reserved for friends, not parents!
And if you feel like they don't really want or need your advice when they come to you for it, maybe they just need a place to vent or talk out loud. A "Tell me what you think" rather than a "here's what I think you should do!" might get you more satisfaction from the conversation.
Here is a piece of advice: Here is an app that all teens should have on their phone called circle of 6. This is an app that can protect your teen in situations that are getting out of control. With a simple touch of the screen they can alert you and 5 other people when they need help and are in an unsafe situation. This is a must use and invaluable app to keep your teen safe.http://www.circleof6app.com